Super Smash Bros. Brawl

Well, it's almost two weeks before Brawl is released in the States and the fact that it has been out this long in Japan probably means you know the final roster of combatants. And while I could spend my time dissecting this (I mean Gannondorf is still a clone of Capt. Falcon? All three StarFox characters have the same Final Smash? R.O.B.?) I've decided to better waste my time giving you the insight into who I wish had made the cut. Now those of you who wish to keep the secret characters truly secret until the end might not want to read on because then you'll know who didn't make it or I might reference a character already in (though I suppose I've already revealed that Gannondorf, Capt. Falcon, R.O.B., and three StarFox characters are in it before warning you... whoops!). So without further ado here are, in no particular order, the Top Ten Characters I Wish Were in Smash.

Miles "Tails" Prower

Honestly I thought this was kind of a given. I mean Sonic is in it, and the blue hedghog has a pantheon of supporting characters just as iconic as Mario's sycophants. So it makes sense to add some characters from Mobius and who better Sonic's sidekick Tails. I mean I would've been fine with Knuckles too, but Tails is clearly the second best choice from the Sonic universe.

Preposed Moveset
Up B: Tail Spin (He spins his tails, he flies up, he hurts people)
B: Some Sort of Mechanical Gun-Thingy (some sort of mechanical gun-thingy)
Over B: Spin Dash (like Sonic's, but slower)
Down B: Spin Charge (like Sonic's, but slower)
Final Smash: Either Super Tails (he's invulnerable and has Super Flickies that attack people) or he gets to use his Tornado walker.

Banjo-Kazooie

I'll admit Banjo-Kazooie was one of my favorite games for the N64, and while some might say it was the worst of the "collecting" platformers, I think it took what was great about Mario 64 and expanded upon that (or ripped it off, whatever it was a great game). They were a popular pair and could've made it into Melee. Of course now that Rare is owned by Microsoft their inclusion was hardly expected, despite the fact that even after the buy Rare still made a B-K game for the GBA and has yet to make one for and X-Box.

Preposed Moveset

Up B: Beak Bomb (Banjo-Kazooie zoom through the air)
B: Egg (Kazooie shoots an egg, maybe like 75% chance of regular, 10% for ice or fire, 5% for grenade)
Over B: Beak Barge (Kazooie's beak rams somebody, slow and powerful)

Down B: Wonderwing (purely defensive, the pair becomes invulnerable for a short time, save from throws)

Final Smash: Mumbo Jumbo comes and turns them into something or does some other shaman magicking.

Mega Man

C'mom it's fucking Mega Man. Yeah, he's been off our radars for some years, but ten years ago he was the (mega) man. He helpes define video games and his ever expanding adapaptable moveset is perfect for Smash. He'd be like Kirby and Samus combined.

Preposed Moveset

Up B: Mega Upper (a series of uppercuts that launch Mega Man higher)
B: Plasma Gun (he shoots his plasma gun)
Over B: Weopan Copy (Mega Man copies an opponets Over B move)
Down B: Mega Ball (a ball that rebounds around until it hits someone, the longer it's out the weaker the attack when it hits)
Final Smash: Hyper Mega Man Adapter (he grows taller, gets wings and jet pack, and has rockets all over him)

Roy

Ok, so Roy did not make the cut into Brawl. And this is really a let down, as Roy was my number 2 go to character. Though I don't know how Ike will compare having not played the game (he is supposed to be heavy/power character so he may just be Roy with another name), I'm guessing I'll miss the Roy.

Preposed Moveset
All his old moves.
Final Smash: Roy rapidly moves on the platform he's one and strikes a deadly blow to whoever may be foolish enough to be there.

Viewtiful Joe

The Viewtiful Joe series have been great innovative games, and Joe has already done a Super Smash rip-off so he's no stranger to this sort of set up. Though he's no longer wowing the video game realm, I'm thinking his moveset would be a very cool addition. I wonder if his VFX meter should be accoutned for though in someway, like he'll turn into regular Joe if he uses too many special moves.

Preposed Moveset
Up B: Corkscrew Jump (You know, a corkscrew jump)
B: Zoom In (Paralyzies foes within a certain proximety)
Over B: Slow (Joe does powerful, super slow punch [maybe kick], but will automatically dodge any attack that is attempted on him)
Down B: Corkscrew Slam (like the jump, but impact on the ground sends shockwaves)
Final Smash: Mach Speed (Joe goes super fast and punches every thing on the screen ending on fire)

Geno

Hells yes, Geno. He maybe a wooden doll inhabited by aliens (or something like that), but he can kick some ass. Besides it's not like I'm about to add Mallow or anything.

Preposed Moveset

Up B: Geno Boost (like the game, but with third jumping abilities)

B: Missile Punch (like the game)

Over B: Geno Beam (like the game)

Down B: Geno Blast (like the game)

Final Smash: Geno Whirl (like the game)

Rival Pokemon Trainer

Pokemon Trainer was a cool idea, so why not do it again with another set of pokemon? Kind of like in the story where you have a rival this is like that. Now we could just do another set of starter pokemon from another generation, but that would be a little like the regular Pokemon Trainer, besides I'm partial to the original 150, so here is just some iconic pokemon you're used to from the original. We already got Water, Fire, Grass, Electric, Psychic (I think), and whatever the fuck Jigglypuff is, so let's get some new types.



Geodude
Up B: Tackle (Geodude shoots up and shoulder slams you)
B: Earthquake (Short range earth shaker)
Over B: Rock Throw (you throw a rock)
Down B: Switch

Dragonair

Up B: Dragon Rage (Spinny tornado thingy)
B: Hyper Beam (Charge shot that can't be saved, will be released when at full power)
Over B: Agility (Lunges out quickly)
Down B: Switch

Gengar
Up B: Dream Eater (Gengar launches upward and passes through people doing damage)
B: Lick (Gengar licks you, and you are stunned a bit)
Over B: Nightshade (A very wide beam is shot out, but doesn't go far)
Down B: Switch

Final Smash: They all come out and lay some smack down.

Ridley

Samus is now the only one of the original eight to not have friend from their series. So let's change that. And Ridley is really the only choice. Generic metroid wouldn't do it, generic Space Pirate wouldn't do it, and I'm not about to include any character from Hunters. Naturally we'll tone down his size and stuff.

Preposed Moveset
Up B: Extra Fly (He flies more and it hurts you some how)
B: Plasma Breath (Ridley's plasma breath)
Over B: Fireballs (Ridely's great balls of fire)
Down B: Tail Swipe (that'll fuck you up)
Final Smash: He could turn into Omerga or Meta Ridley or just grow humongous and wreaks havoc.

Rash

I don't know if I'm the only one who remembers Battletoads, but I loved that game. It was so freaking hard and awesome. I extend my love by including one of them into Smash.

Peposed Moveset
Up B: Mega Slam (thrid jump that at it's height, Rash slams his fists downward)
B: Giant Fist (large powerful fist[ing hehehe])
Over B: Ram Headbut (the ram horned headbut from the game)
Down B: Boot Punt (the huge ass boot from the game)
Final Smash: It's be cool if those impossible to avoid race things would move across the screen and eveyone but you had to dodge it.

Koopalings

Fuck Bowser Jr., okay? Honestly I've got nothing really against him, only that since he appeared, we've heard nothing about Bowser's seven other kids, the originals (though breaking news is informing me they were in Mario & Luigi Superstar Saga, but I don't count that, because I'm writing this paragraph). I'm talking Larry, Morton Jr., Wendy O', Iggy, the weird one on the ball, Roy, and Ludwig Von. What happened? Were they all shipped off to boarding school or something? Really I don't know how this would work, maybe they all have the same moveset and speed and changing the "color" changes it to a different one, or maybe you only have one, or you can switch out like Pokemon trainer, what do I care? Let's just represent some other Koopa Kid love for once.

Preposed Moveset
Up B: Koopa Whirl (they go in shell and spin upward, much more so than Bowser's but harder to aim)
B: Wand Beam (they use their wand thingy from Super Mario Bros. 3)
Over B: Special Unique Move (that each particular kid has; look I just don't want to think anymore ok?)
Down B: Koopa Slam (they slam down butt first, like you do)
Final Smash: All seven appear with a weopan (a chainsaw, katana, brass knuckles, chains, dual weilding Uzis, battle axe, and sawed-off shotgun) and just start killing and decapitating eveyone, until those smug Mario Brothers, who think it's cool to beat up children, have their heads on pikes and are surrounded by a flowing river of blow that curses all who touch it.